Saturday, September 27, 2014

The essence of marriage in Islam

Marriage is not only a legalisation of relationship between a man and a woman:

1. It is an 'ibadah', an act of worshipping to Allah, God the Almighty. Worship in Islam is not only praying, fasting or giving charity. Anything you do following the command of Allah is an act of worshipping; and Marriage is one of them.
Why do we have to worship Allah? Because everything that we have and enjoy is from Allah, even our existence is a gift from Allah.

2. It is also an act of constant God-consciousness. Marriage protects us from unlawful relationship. Sexual relationship outside marriage knot is a great sin and will earn the curse and wrath of Allah. Marriage will protect us, our family and the community from that curse.

3. Through this marriage, in-sya’ Allah, God will bless the couple with beautiful and righteous children which will complete your happiness and will continue our mission to look after this planet.

4. Marriage is an institution of da’wah in which husband and wife will learn, advice, encourage and support each other to become better human beings in terms of our relationship with God, with our fellow human beings and with the environment.

Islam is a very natural and sensible religion. In order to attain closeness to God, you must not go against your natural desire and avoid marriage; in fact marriage actually helps you to become a better servant of God. Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) said, "Whoever marries has completed half of his faith, so let him beware of Allah regarding the other half."

Saturday, January 14, 2012

The Etiquettes Of Marriage And Wedding

By: Sheikh Muhammad Naasirudden al-Albaani

All praise is due to Allah, the One who said in the clear verses of His Book:

"And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among
yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put
love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are Signs for those
who reflect".[al-Room 30:21]

It should be known that there is much etiquette in the area of marriage. All that I am concerned with here in this quickly compiled work is that which is authenticated of the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad, that which is irreproachable from the standpoint of its chain of narration and upon which no doubt can be cast in terms of its constructions and meanings. In this way, whoever reads and follows this information will be on a clearly established basis in religion, and will have full confidence in the source and validity of his actions. I hope for him that Allaah will put the final seal of felicity on his life, in reward for beginning his married life with the following of the sunnah, and to make for him among His slaves whose statement He has described in the Qur'an saying:
And those who pray, "Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring
who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace)
to lead the righteous."
[al-Furqaan 25:74]

The final disposition of things is for those of pious practice, as the Lord of the Worlds said:
As to the Righteous, they shall be amidst (cool) shades
and springs (of water). And (they shall have) fruits, - all
they desire. "Eat ye and drink ye to your heart's content:
for that ye worked (righteousness)." Thus do We
certainly reward the Doers of Good.
[al-Mursalaat 77:41-44]

The following then, are those etiquettes:

1. Kindness toward your wife when you wish to enter into her

It is desirable, when one goes into his wife on his wedding night, to show her kindness, such as presenting her with something to drink, etc. This is found in the hadith narrated by Asmaa' bint Yazid ibn As-Sakan who said: "I beautified 'Aa'ishah for Allaah's Messenger, then called him to come to see her unveiled. He came, sat next to her, and brought a large cup of milk from which he drank. Then, he offered it to 'Aa'ishah, but she lowered her head and felt shy. I scolded her and said to her: "Take from the hand of the Prophet." She then took it and drank some. Then, the Prophet said to her, "Give some to your companion." At that point, I said: "O Messenger of Allaah, rather take it yourself and drink, and then give it to me from your hand." He took it, drank some, and then offered it to me. I sat down and put it on my knees. Then, I began rotating it and following it with my lips in order that I might hit the spot from which the Prophet had drunk. Then, the Prophet said about some women who were there with me: "Give them some." But, they said: "We don't want it." (i.e. we are not hungry). The Prophet said: "Do not combine hunger and fibbing!" [Ahmad and al-Humaidi. Ahmad reports it with 2 isnaads - one of which supports the other, and it is supported...]"

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Marriage in Islam

With His wisdom and out of His mercy, Allah has made the Children of Adam male and female, and has institutionalized marriage to make the females mates for the males and vice-versa. The Quran says:
وَمِنْ ءايَـتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَجاً لِّتَسْكُنُواْ إِلَيْهَا
وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِى ذَلِكَ لأَيَـتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
Ar Rum 30: 21. And among His signs is this; that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.


وَاللَّهُ جَعَلَ لَكُمْ مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا وَجَعَلَ لَكُمْ مِّنْ أَزْوَجِكُم بَنِينَ وَحَفَدَةً
وَرَزَقَكُم مِّنَ الطَّيِّبَاتِ أَفَبِالْبَـطِلِ يُؤْمِنُونَ وَبِنِعْمَتِ اللَّهِ هُمْ يَكْفُرُونَ
An Nahl 16: 72. And Allah has made for you mates of your own kind, and has made for you, from your mates, children and grandchildren, and has granted you good provisions. Do they then believe in false deities and deny favour of Allah.

These verses of the Noble Quran draw at least two purposes of marriage; companionship and procreation. Marriage allows a man and a woman live together in peace and tranquillity enjoying each other’s company. Marriage is a lawful means to fulfil the basic biological instinct to have sexual relation. Sexual relation outside marriage tie is a major sin but when it is done within the institution of marriage, the reward is like giving charity. Through the fulfilment of this biological instinct Allah grants them children that will continue the mission of human’s creation as ‘khalifah’, representing God on the surface of the Earth to look after this planet. Islamic law has prescribed detailed rules not only the rights and the responsibilities of husband and wife, but also of their offspring.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Brief Guidelines to Enter Islamic Marriage

This brief advise is intended to help Muslim husband and wife to-be prepare themselves with basic knowledge to enter marriage life. I collected and summarised this from different sources and insya Allah is applicable across all madzhabs.
  1. When one goes into his wife on his wedding night, he should show her kindness by presenting her with a bunch of flowers, something to drink, etc.
  2. The husband should, at the time of consummating the marriage with his wife or before that, place his hand on the front part of her head, mention the name of Allâh Most High, and pray for Allâh's blessings.
  3. It is desirable for the husband and wife to pray 2 rakât together on their wedding night.
  4. When a Muslim man is about to enter his wife, he should always say first: Bismillahi, Allâhumma jannibnâ ash-shaitân, wa jannib ash-shaitân mâ razaqtana [In the name of Allâh, O Allâh, keep us away from the devil, and keep the devil away from that which You may grant us (ie. offspring).]
  5. It is allowed for a Muslim man to enter his wife in her vagina from any direction he wishes - from behind or from the front.

So, You are ready but don't know where to start?

I offer a combination of Islamic and civil rites to solemnise your marriage. The Islamic ceremony (nikah) will ensure you that the contract you are about to enter is not only witnessed by your family and friends, but also recognised and blessed by Allah and His angels. The civil rites will make your wedding recognised by the Australian Law and ensure your rights are protected. So, how do we do this? 

A. Paper work prior to the wedding day 
  1. Make an appointment by phone or email (detail on my complete profile under ‘About ME’).
  2. During our first meeting, I will assist you to complete Notice of Intended Marriage (NOIM). Under Marriage Act 1961, a couple intending to get married in Australia must complete NOIM and sign it witnessed by a Marriage Celebrant no less than 1 month and no more than 18 months prior to the marriage being solemnised.
  3. In completing NOIM, original Birth Certificate or authorised extract of such certificate must be produced. Alternatively, an Australian or overseas passport in lieu of the birth certificate is acceptable. If one cannot produce a birth certificate or overseas passport the Celebrant will take a Statutory Declaration with details of birth date, place and parents' names together with an explanation as to why the birth certificate is not available.
  4. In the case of persons previously married an original copy of your Decree Absolute or an original copy of the Death Certificate must be produced before the marriage can take place.
  5. Prior to the wedding, both parties will be required to sign a declaration stating that you believe there is no legal impediment to the marriage between yourself and your partner. This is a legal document and calls for honesty at all times.
  6. One week before the wedding, I require The Bride and The Groom To Be to attend the 'guide to happy and blessed marriage' briefing that covers; intention, rights/responsiblities and dos/don'ts in marriage.

B. Sample of a Wedding Ceremony
  1. Welcoming/Monitum
  2. Wedding Sermon. It contains advices about human relationship and marriage.
  3. Ijab-Qabul or Offer and Acceptance. The Wali (male paternal relative of the bride, usually her father or her brother) pronounce the Ijab statement and the groom respond to it by making the Qabul statement. At least two practicing Muslims males (or one male and two females) are present and witness the pronouncement of ijab-qabul.
  4. Exchange of vows and presenting the dowry or mahr. The groom will hand in the dowry to his bride. While presenting the dowry to the bride, the groom and the bride exchange vows.
  5. Signing documents
  6. Marriage Supplication
  7. Presentation of the couple and closing the ceremony
Please note that the above procession is only a draft to give you some ideas. The items of procession and their orders are very much based on your inputs and suggestions. After all, it’s YOUR WEDDING!